I Don't Wanna Know Your Name

As many as 12% of Irish people are happy to have sex without even getting to know their prospective partner's name first. That's just one of the fascinating statistics to emerge in a Durex Sex Survey, commissioned to mark National Condom Week.

Anne Sexton, 23 Oct 2008

“In the last week, I’ve had sex once. I tell myself that it’s quality not quantity that counts, right? But I can’t shake the nagging feeling that when it comes to sex, more is more, and that’s exactly what I’d like. Not necessarily every day, mind you – I’m not greedy – but two or three times a week would be perfect.

“I wonder if I’d have more sex if I felt more comfortable trying new things. Sure I can talk about sex with my partner, but when it comes down to the nitty gritty I feel a little self-conscious. What if I get it wrong? I just couldn’t face that.

“The last time I popped into Boots I considered buying a cock ring – it’s amazing what they sell in there these days. I thought, you know, I’d give it a go just to try something new, but Jesus! I just couldn’t manage. The closer I got to the check out, the more embarrassed I got too. I had to put it back. It was bad enough buying the damn condoms. But at least I did buy them this time.

“Are my friends having better or more sex than me? I’d like to know, but I don’t feel right about asking them. Nope, it would be awkward. Granted, not as bad as asking my brother or sister for their opinions, and definitely not as bad as talking to the parents, but still, I don’t fancy the idea. Besides, chances are they’d be embarrassed too, and that’s the last thing you want – everyone mumbling into their pints and turning red. Best to keep quiet, I think.

“Despite this, I am feeling pretty chuffed with myself. They say everything in life comes down to timing and this week I managed to have an orgasm between the headlines and the weather. Woo hoo! So I’m (sort of) well informed and (sort of) satisfied too! All in all, life’s not too shabby…”

That, dear HP readers, is a pretty good evocation of the average Irish sex life. Average being the operative word – not awful, but not awfully exciting either. In the run up to this year’s National Condom Week (6 to 12 October), Durex surveyed Irish people about their sexual attitudes and experiences and found that, in some ways sex – Irish style – leaves a lot to be desired.

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