There are, happily, several hot cinema tickets this fortnight. The Lives Of Others offers coruscating moral and political drama. Curse Of The Golden Flower features nearly two hours of glittering spectacle. ButBlades Of Glory has Will Ferrell and Jon Heder kicking each other as ice-skating rivals. It hardly needs to be said that this is one for the ages.
As the film opens, the Napoleon Dynamite star is perfecting the galloping peacock and flouncing around the rink as the winner of the 2002 World Figure Skating Championships, a title he is forced to share with Mr. Ferrell, the sport’s swaggering he-man. When violence erupts on the podium, they are both banned from the men’s singles competition for the rest of their lives. After three miserable years in the wilderness, they return to the sport they love as a same-sex skating couple. Will they triumph over the ridiculously evil reigning champions? Well, of course, but you’ll have fun getting there. Belonging to the same noble genus as Dodgeball and Talladega Nights, Blades creates a splendidly stupid universe. Heder returns to the ice when his stalker complains about the embarrassment of stalking a nobody. Ferrell’s Chazz Michael Michaels, we are told, emerged from the underground figure skating scene in Detroit to become the only man with four titles and an adult film award.
The physical comedy is all that we’d expect. Ferrell never lets a scene pass without adding a comic macho snarl or pelvic thrust. Heder is delightfully fey and goofy. If they’re ever looking to cast for Football In The Groin, I think we’ve found our guys.