At last, Caesar, news from our legions in the North…Empire comedy club regular PATRICK McGAUGHEY recently visited the International’s Comedy Cellar where he easily won over that most discerning of audiences with a flawless routine. Belfast native Patrick promises to return to Dublin in the near future, indeed he was seen in confab with the Ha’penny Inn’s golden boy DECLAN ROONEY who later confessed to be planning to bring a gaggle of comedians down from the Empire to perform a one-off special. What is the collective name for a group of comedians? A chuckle? A chortle? Answers on a Ryvita cracker, please. COLIN MURPHY is another Empire regular who was extremely impressive in a recent visit to Dublin’s Shelter at Vicar St. Among a capacity crowd was RTE’s BILLY MAGRATH, possibly indicating that Colin has not disappeared from our screens now that Blizzard Of Odd is on holidays. Could all this be the start of a Northern invasion?

A confused PHIL KAY takes the chair in our Mad Hatter column elsewhere in this issue, but pity the poor hack who had to convince Phil

to submit to the questionnaire. “I can’t do questionnaires,” wailed Phil, “I’ve never done one, I think they should be banned, I hate them. I mean, what’s your favourite record? Fuck off!! Can we not just talk??!!” Mr Kay will be doing just that in the Shelter at Vicar St., on March 2nd, and at Cuba in Galway on March 16th. A stand-up stand up and a lovely, lovely man. There, I’ve said it.

Bicycling boy-about-town DAVID O’DOHERTY, whose Ronan Long Gets It Wrong children’s tale has just been optioned by Brown Bag Films for an animated feature, is shortly to come back with a brand new one-man-show this Spring. We’ll keep you posted. Also launching a new show are RTE New Comedy Award winners NEIL DELEMARE and JAMES GOULDSBURY who, accompanied by MATT SADLIER, bring their latest epic to Andrews Lane theatre on the 8th and 15th of March. This is an excellent opportunity to see young Delemare in particular practice his not inconsiderable talents on a big stage, and Laughlines, for one, will be right in the front row trying to make him nervous. Jealous bastards that we are… MICHAEL MEE recently shocked the hotpress news desk with a press release titled Michael Mee Goes Down! which upon investigation turned out to be a reference to a recent gig in Cork, as opposed to an extremely enjoyable sexual practice. Chance would be a fine thing, as Michael would concur, no doubt…

Congratulations to the International Bar’s Comedy Improv team on an excellent series of gigs at Dublin’s Shelter which were recorded for broadcast by RTE Radio 1. Seen in the audience was one BARRY MURPHY who laughed uproariously when he was asked by a certain naïve hack if he was script editor on the project. “Script Editor on an improv show? You’re a tosser, Robinson,” he joked. A-hem…

Jetting in this month for gigs at Dublin’s Olympia Theatre are VICTORIA WOOD and JACK DEE, see our What’s On Comedy Listings for details.

Last but not least, and lifted from the hotpress website message board at hotpress.com , a posting concerning mis-heard lyrics. It seems that on ‘Raspberry Beret’ by PRINCE a reader believed that his Purpleness was actually singing “Brass Stereogram, the kind you buy in a second-hand store…” Well, it made me laugh… Check it out for some other howlers.