THEY began like real professionals, deciding to proceed democratically in alphabetical order. That meant starting with Bacardi, but tensions between the two surfaced almost immediately.

Hayden, as always on the look-out for ways to merge drink and music, suggested following a Bacardi recipe which included Cranberry juice. Lambert objected, not only because the recipe requires Bacardi Light Dry and the bottle in hand was Bacardi Premium Black, but he also objected to Hayden’s reference to a rival band. “Why can’t you make a drink with Blink in it?”, the sensitive Lambert, inquired somewhat tetchily.

After some deliberation Hayden came up with a means of assuaging the Blinkman’s hurt. “Okay”, he says, “Bacardi, Ice, Lime. That’s BLI. Now you finish it. Quick as a flash, Lambert comes back with “and No Kiskadee. There’s your NK.”

And thus Bacardi Blink was launched: Bacardi with Ice and Lime and definitely No Kiskadee. It slipped down a treat with both participants and got the decisive nod from their quality control department.

After that there was very little chat for a while as Hayden and Lambert tackled a couple of official recipes from the Bacardi Drinks Guide. Hayden opted for Bacardi with bitter lemon (and a slice of lemon), while Lambert settled down with Bacardi on the Rocks, simply pouring two measures of Bacardi over ice, and idly lip-synching to the music on the hi-fi, ‘It’s Not My Fault’ from the Blink debut album. The words “Fill the world with it, fill the streets with it, fill the life with it, fill the sky with it” seemed rather appropriate. It was a Happy Day indeed.

The next liquid balm for our two heroes to sample was Kilbeggan Irish Whiskey. “Is this new?” asked Lambert. “No,” replied Hayden before adding, with the suave confidence for which he is renowned, “it’s actually been on the market since 1757 and is produced by the John Locke Distillery. The tradition of distilling in Kilbeggan actually began with monks as far back as the twelfth century.”

Somewhat astonished at Hayden’s apparently encyclopaedic knowledge, the mystified Lambert blurted out: “How the hell could you possibly know all that?” “Its all here”, said Hayden,” it says so on the label”. Lambert was clearly disgusted at Hayden’s cheating and refused to discuss making any cocktail using whiskey.

So that was how they came to down one or several shots of Kilbeggan Irish Whiskey neat and unadulterated, no water, no ice, not even a tear to dilute its heavenly flavour. When Hayden decided to risk asking Lambert what he thought of it, since it was his first taste of Kilbeggan, he could stir no answer from the singer, but the voice on the record was singing, “I am happy to be me. That’s all. I’m sitting on a mountain in Nepal. I’m happy to be nothing and I’m the happiest of all.”

“Suit yourself”, said Hayden, although his truculence disappeared as he refilled his glass, leaving his drinking buddy temporarily in Nepal, or somewhere even further away.

After the briefest of brief breaks, Hayden reappeared covetously clutching a bottle of Saint Brendan’s, the Irish cream liqueur, and poured himself a generous helping of the tempting looking produce. Lambert obviously decided that a rapprochement with Hayden might be in order if he wasn’t going to miss the rest of the party. “How would you like to spend Christmas with the band in Iceland?” he casually asked, as he seductively eyed the elegant bottle of Saint Brendan’s in Hayden’s possession.

Always willing to accept the hand of friendship, or a free trip, no matter how imaginary, Hayden handed Lambert the bottle. Both, in due course, agreed that Saint Brendan’s is lighter, smoother and tastier than similar products on the market. It’s amazing how a couple of drinks can cure all kinds of disputes and clear up misunderstandings. Lambert was even impressed enough to read every word about the product on the pack, treating Hayden to the enchanting story of Saint Brendan’s voyage across the Atlantic to America some ten years before Columbus.

“But did he ever get as far as Nepal?”, Hayden mused, as the compact disc on the hi-fi reaches the point on the Blink album where the song ‘Separation’ starts with Lambert singing “Gone to heaven in a tub, not a pretty sight but a nice way to go.”

The next product for sampling was Sheridans. Now Lambert immediately refused to believe that the bottle is actually the shape it is. He was equally adamant that it would be impossible to keep two different coloured liquids apart in the same bottle. He was even more amazed, however, that Hayden was capable of opening the bottle and pouring the appetising liquids into two glasses.

The fact that this could be achieved under the circumstances was down to the new ‘perfect pour’ top attached to the top of the bottle of Sheridans, rather than to any manual dexterity on the part of somewhat tired and emotional Hayden, but Lambert was unaware of this and marvelled at the skills of his colleague, while still worrying if his eyes needed testing every time he caught sight of the strange shape of the bottle.

He was even more impressed when he sampled the drink. “Hey, this is brilliant,” he exclaimed, although he was not quite sure how the vanilla cream liqueur always ends up on top of the coffee chocolate liqueur. After he discovered the delights of the pouring device, and proudly observed that this is a Dublin product, he made several attempts to pour it so that the two parts end up in the glass reversed, but he failed miserably time. That, of course, did not prevent him enjoying it exactly as the manufacturers intended.

He also took some time out to explain to Hayden that not only does one part of the drink always end up in the glass on top of the other one, but if you look at them in the bottle, the dark liquid is always on the left and the creamy liquid is on the right.

“Not so”, said Hayden, deftly moving the bottle around so that the dark liquid was on the right. Lambert started to argue, but decided the discussion might be best left until morning and poured another drink for his buddy as the CD was playing ‘The Greatest Trick’ and Lambert’s voice was singing “It’s the least I can do for you after what you’ve done for me.”

“Now, pour me another one,” Hayden said. And both of them rubbed their hands in expectation.

Bacardi Premium Black Rum is a mellow dark spirit from the creators of Bacardi Light Dry Rum.

Premium Black is aged for up to four years which gives it a great flavoursome, full bodied taste without the bitterness of some dark or amber spirits.

It can be enjoyed neat, poured over a little ice, or sample the smooth taste of Premium Black with a variety of soft-drink mixers including orange juice, ginger ale and white or red lemonade.

For the ultimate decadent gift this Christmas

Why not impress your friends at dinner by demonstrating how brilliant you are at pouring the new Sheridan’s Perfect Pour Double Liqueur. Gilbeys have recently invested £1 million to create this new pouring device allowing you to pour one-third cool vanilla cream liqueur over two thirds rich coffee chocolate liqueur First Time, Every Time, All in One Pour.

So go on show off – pour your stuff