In the wake of his current travails at Chelsea, I have been racking my brains to try and remember the last memorable thing Dennis Wise did on a football field.

All I can come up with are his photo opportunity with his baby son after last season s FA Cup final, and his testicularly-oriented assault on Nicky Butt during that 5-0 win over Man United. Which rather says it all about the player that Chelsea have been moving heaven and earth to hang on to, all week.
Wise was at it again the other week, openly questioning the competence of his own boss, Claudio Ranieri, after a farcical 2-2 draw at Ipswich that had seen Chelsea squander a two-nil lead, and ended it by demanding a transfer unless he could have his place back.
Admittedly, the embattled Ranieri had fucked up big-time during the game, making a series of tactical gaffes and cock-ups which, among other things, saw the lumbering Marcel Desailly finish the match at left-back.
There is, however, a wider picture to be looked at here. For a football club, particularly one as aspirational and ambitious as Chelsea, an adherence to the authority of a clearly-defined chain of command goes without saying. These things have to stay in-house at all costs, otherwise you might just as well give up and go home.
After the Ipswich game, Wise began bleating to the press about his manager s supposed lack of acumen and savoir faire, reeling off a list of all the tactical changes Ranieri had made during the game the implied subtext being that he wouldn t trust Ranieri with the Aberdeen job.
Ranieri dropped him, to which he responded by handing in a transfer request. Then came the incredible sight of the whole club wringing their hands in an effort to hold on what they mistakenly view as one of their prize assets.
The managing director, Colin Hutchinson, swore to do everything possible to rid Wise of his new-found wanderlust, and half the first-team squad were subsequently quoted as vowing to do their utmost to keep the narky little troublemaker at Stamford Bridge. Say it ain t so, Dennis. Say it ain t so.
Yet Wise is still there as I write, which means that Ranieri the man in charge of the club s football affairs, remember lacks either the will or the power to sling him out on his ear.
It s probably futile to speculate on what would happen if a senior Arsenal or Manchester United player tried the same thing. The days when Chelsea were considered a serious threat to United s supremacy, and shared equal billing with Arsenal as the main challengers, recede ever more with the passing of each defeat at places like Pride Park and the Riverside.
It helps Wise s cause that Ranieri s stewardship of Chelsea has been characterised by the kind of astonishing inconsistency that used to be the sole preserve of Roy Evans Liverpool. But despite their current mid-table inertia, there have been some good things about their season, like the emergence of the skilful Sam Dalla Bona in midfield, and the excellence of Eidur Gudjohnsen up front.
They are one of only two teams (Liverpool being the other) to get any joy out of Man United at Old Trafford, and they have improved their unsatisfactory scoring record significantly on last season.
Ranieri s priority at the moment is to impose his own brand of management. How can this be done with a senior player who regards himself as untouchable in
both word and deed, and who apparently feels that his primary duty is not to
play but to undermine his own boss? Wise s continued presence at Chelsea should be Ranieri s decision, not the other way around.
In any case, Wise has been promised a coaching role at Chelsea when he finishes playing, a development which by definition means that he and Ranieri are working from different agendas right now.
Of course, we ve been here before, when Gianluca Vialli s status as Chelsea boss was undermined after Frank Leboeuf savaged him in the papers following a heavy defeat by Barcelona last season.
Whether by choice or necessity, Vialli let it go, and Leboeuf not, one would think, a remotely good enough player to be bulletproof against the risks of making such statements emerged unscathed. Vialli was sacked four months later.
Leboeuf, a conceited clown with little to be conceited about, is very much part of the problem with Chelsea, who can t even cling to their reputation as a good cup side these days.
They didn t last candlelight in the Worthington Cup, the mighty St Gallen beat their ass like a gong in the UEFA Cup, and right now one would expect the FA Cup (their last realistic route back into Europe) to slip out of their hands as well.
You could liken them to Tottenham, another London side top-heavy with underachieving wasters who are as pathetic away as they are invincible at home. But at least Spurs don t have the highest wage bill in the land hanging over their heads like some sort of financial Rock of Sisyphus.
Of which the 34-year-old Wise, if reports are to be believed, is a beneficiary to an extent surpassed only by Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink and Gianfranco Zola. It s long past time that somebody called his bluff. Go, in the name of God, go.