Dear oh dear, what’s going on here? Brandy gets jiggy over a rhythm track that sounds like one of those funky machines in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Industrial R’n’B?

Sorry about all the kiddies film references but I was babysitting all weekend. As was Princess Superstar, apparently, who comes across as Eminem in knickers: “One day you’ll know how nice it is to get laid while you’re getting’ paid”. Eeeowww! You can babysit for me anytime, princess.