Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me

GLORIA ESTEFAN: “Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me” (Sony)

HAVE YOU ever stopped and considered that there probably are a thousand better things on which you could spend your money than certain albums? That thought struck me on hearing Gloria Estefan’s latest album: I mean, who really needs another set of cover versions of hits from the ’60s and ’70s apart, perhaps, from Gloria’s bank manager?

And so, on a selection of songs that is singularly lacking in terms of innovation or imagination, Ms Estefan and executive producer/manager/husband Emilio put orchestra, backing vocalists and even synthesisers through the mill and effectively kills classics such as ‘You’ve Made Me So Very Happy’ and ‘It’s Too Late’.

Worst cut? That title should be reserved for a totally soulless reading of ‘Everlasting Love’ or maybe ‘Goodnight My Love’, which Gloria says she “had to include because Emilio says it reminds him of me.” Very cute, but haven’t lovebirds Gloria and Emilio ever heard of bedside tape machines on which they can endlessly sigh sweet nothings instead of burdening the rest of us with such unnecessary trivia?

Next, please.

• Joe Jackson