In this increasingly secular and consumerist society, it is hard to find meaning in the expensive, stressful, drunken and hyped-up marketing orgy called Christmas.

I imagine there are a few readers of this magazine who just might, on the day itself, reflect on its origin and significance, perhaps in a church, and genuinely celebrate the birth of a man who, in his day, espoused highly progressive and inspirational beliefs, challenged the old order, and offered self-sacrifice as a model for human love and compassion. As it’s a birthday, one might be encouraged to think afresh about renewal and hope, and meditate on the mysteries of life’s meaning, as one always does when one sees a newborn infant, in awe at the infinite possibilities that lie ahead.

The trouble is that this important human need for ritual, one that offers solace and contemplation and a recharging of one’s spiritual and moral batteries, enabling one to stay on course, ethically and healthily, with a new resolve to live life the best way one can, against all the odds, has increasingly become unfashionable. Largely this is the tragedy of Christianity itself - by which I mean the seeds to the Church’s loss of influence can be traced back to mistakes it has made, and continues to make, on issues related to women and sexuality, and of the desire to maintain institutional, political and cultural power at the expense of common decency. The vessel should never be more important than its contents, the church never more important than the children (and adults) in its care.

In the past century, the increasing emphasis on the rights of the individual over the rights of empire/government/ monarchy/multinational corporation/ church means that people are freer, but also more and more isolated. Since the ‘60s, when the personal and private became political and shame-less, and people began to reject the mechanisms of social control that dictated they should feel guilt for expressing themselves how they saw fit, the church has faced its toughest challenge - how to model living an ethical, reflective and kind life, and yet still uphold orthodox moral positions on sexuality that were unethical, unthinking, and unkind. This is the crux of the issue that is splitting the Anglican church wide, that is dividing the American electorate with its convulsions over gay marriage.

The priesthood, for centuries a refuge for men seeking a life that avoided women, has always had a “don’t ask, don’t tell” attitude to gay priests. (Same holds true for nuns, of course, but they never had a hand in writing canon law.) This worked well enough, as long as the consensus was that they deserved to feel guilty, as long as it was no one’s business but their own and their confessor’s. In a funny way, there is something fundamentally democratic in the position that everyone is a sinner, including priests. As long as everyone believes it, then it creates an atmosphere that is less punitive and more compassionate. But the rot set in, and people began to shake off the notion that they were inherently immoral and tainted. I blame the women, myself.
Eschewing shame as a guide to personal morality carries risks; obvious especially when it comes to some gay men and their attitude to sexual health. A code I’ve heard recently, fairly frequently, from men seeking others who are into fucking without a condom is “open-minded”. This bugs the hell out of me. The split between the sexual outlaw and the pious priest has to be healed - the queer has to be welcomed openly into the church, and a decent morality - of a life-preserving kind - has to be welcomed into the queer world. I am greatly encouraged by the new Archbishop of Dublin Dr Diarmuid Martin’s comments recently that he welcomed legislation to protect same-sex couples. It’s the first chink of light I’ve ever seen in the Irish Church’s position on homosexuality, and it goes against Papal advice. Hallelujah!

It’s not that I want to be a Catholic again. It’s that I want religion to do what it’s supposed to do. I want it to be a force for peace and reflection and charity and goodwill in the world. That takes courage and commitment and passion, and in this world it is increasingly difficult. The Christ that I’ve read about befriended a sexual outcast against the hate-filled mob - that’s one of the fundamental teachings of his life. The more a church behaves like the mob - and the rabid stone-throwing wing of the Evangelical Anglicans springs to mind here, as well as the charming people behind www.godhatesfags.com - then the more it becomes a perversion, a mockery, of what the man Himself stood for.

Happy Christmas.