NEW SEX TOY LAUNCHED FOR FITNESS FANATICS

A sex toy app for the Fitbit generation has arrived, allowing women to track the calories they’re burning while masturbating. Zalo are the first sex toy manufacturer in the world to offer the feature on their vibrators, which are synced to a handy mobile app. By the company’s calculations, masturbating three times a week for 10 minutes will burn up 90 calories!

WELSH SCHOOLS GO GENDER-NEUTRAL

Setting a precedent for neighbouring countries, the Welsh government have announced the introduction of gender-neutral school uniforms. Welsh Minister for Education Kirsty Williams has spoken out about “enforcing outdated ideas of what clothes are suitable for their gender” - meaning “boys” and “girls” labels will be removed from trousers and skirts. A primary school in Greystones, Co. Wicklow is leading the charge for a similar policy on these shores.

CANADIAN ACTIVISTS CONDEMN ANTI-ABORTION FILM

Abortion rights activists in Canada have criticised the country’s largest cinema chain, Cineplex Entertainment, for screening a highly controversial American film. Unplanned has been widely described as “anti-abortion propaganda”, while Planned Parenthood reports that the film includes “many falsehoods”. The Abortion Rights Coalition of Canada argues that Cineplex Entertainment have “made a decision based on money, not freedom of speech”, and fear that the film could spark a wave of anti-abortion hate in the country.

WOMEN ARE HAVING MORE SEX DREAMS THAN EVER

Researchers at the University of Freiburg, Germany have revealed that women aged 16 to 30 are having three times more sex dreams than they did 50 years ago. While only a small percentage of women reported having erotic dreams in similar studies in 1966 and 1998, the new research finds that young women today experience sexual dreaming 22% of the time, thanks to the mitigated stigma around female sexuality. Sweet dreams!

GENDER REVEAL PARTY GOES UP IN SMOKE

Partygoers got more than they bargained for after a gender reveal event in Australia ended with an exploding car. The Queensland Police Service has released footage of the incident, warning that the increasingly popular “burnout” gender reveal feature, which involves cars emitting clouds of pink or blue smoke, has resulted in several cases of flaming vehicles. Back in 2017, another dangerous gender reveal party saw an off-duty US Border Patrol agent and dad-to-be shoot at a target packed with Tannerite, a highly explosive substance. The target released a cloud of blue smoke - but also resulted in a major fire that spread to the Coronado National Forest. With the whole notion of the gender reveal party becoming an increasingly outdated phenomenon, maybe it’s time to put these hijinks to bed.